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10 Tips for Winning the Respect of Your Followers

Francie Dalton
Francie Dalton, CMC, is president of Dalton Alliances, Inc., a Maryland-based business consultancy specializing in the communication, management, and behavioral sciences.

Today, Friday, Oct. 16 is National Boss's Day. Here are 10 ways to increase your effectiveness as a leader and win the love and respect of your followers:

1. Whenever an idea comes to mind, assign it to someone else immediately. Don't be concerned about whether it should be done. You can always abandon it later.

2. Never put things in writing. Someone else can keep track of important things for you.

3. Always assign the same task to multiple people. This will help you leverage the risk of missed deadlines.

4. Don't inform staff of your calendar. Your staff will come to love that sense of the unexpected and will be happy to see you when you do drop by.

5. Change your mind often. Particularly on major projects. This demonstrates flexibility.

6. Don't hesitate to switch up people's responsibilies - and don't worry about remembering to let appropriate staff know about such decisions. Remember: They're smart and will figure it out.

7. Don't have agendas for meetings. After all, staff should just enjoy being together, and an agenda would probably constrain innovative thinking.

8. Whenever staff are handling a particularly difficult situation, call them every five minutes or so to offer assistance and to provide feedback on the actions they're taking. They'll be grateful for your input.

9. As you meet competent people during networking events, instantly retain them as subcontractors for...something. Your direct reports are sure to appreciate the extra help.

10. Remind your subordinates that today is Bosses' Day. They'll be thrilled for the opportunity to express their respect for your leadership style.

Photo Credit: The "World's Best Boss" photo is reprinted here courtesy of Matt Pendergraff of PDG+creative

By Francie Dalton

 |  October 16, 2009; 10:29 AM ET |  Category:  Humor Save & Share:  Send E-mail   Facebook   Twitter   Digg   Yahoo Buzz   Del.icio.us   StumbleUpon   Technorati  
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Comments

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From the comments generated, I deduce that the people that have a job find this funny and the ones that don't have a job do not find this funny??? On second thought, it is not that complicated. Some people just don't have a sense of humor! Regardless of where we are at in our lives, our attitude determines whether we laugh or cry in any differant situation. I truly feel for the people that attack this piece when the real issue is in the mirror.

Posted by: boehmdwight | October 22, 2009 12:51 PM

Hmm, sorry I have an odd sense of humor, I was hoping other people would keep having fun with this article.

Posted by: timscanlon | October 18, 2009 10:39 PM

In the spirit of the evil overlords list, I'll add some numbers to this...

11. Conduct at least 2 planning meetings for a meeting that's being held to make a plan. Require reports prior to all of those meetings.

12. When an employee's spouse, parent, child, or significant other passes away, make sure to threaten their continued employment on the first anniversary of that persons passing. Make sure to mark your calendars so your employees don't need to remind you of this, it's probably better as a surprise.

13. If an employee has a disability or an unattractive flaw, make sure to draw inappropriate attention to it, and treat the person as though they are less valued than other employees.

Posted by: timscanlon | October 17, 2009 2:10 AM

Ha!!HA!! plenty of fun reading the article but also the comments.

One thing is certain, don't be BOSSY while working in a group, don't be ever bossy at home,unless you want become ground meatball, with your spouse-most dangerous adversary

Posted by: jayrkay | October 16, 2009 10:27 PM

If Francie Dalton wants to contribute to our society I suggest she focus on the employment problem rather that ramble on about this useless topic. We have a VERY SEVERE employment problem in this country and the last thing that will help is someone who specializes in the communication, management, and behavioral sciences.

This is a typical corporate-controlled big-media article featuring some useless person who specializes in useless knowledge.

Francie, I suggest you spend some time with married homeless people who are working full time jobs. Even further, spend some time with their children.

Posted by: swazendo | October 16, 2009 7:41 PM

This better be a joke

Posted by: gs26 | October 16, 2009 7:21 PM

I think she moonlights at AIG. Funny article though.

Posted by: southportwave | October 16, 2009 7:13 PM

Ha ha. With respect to Point No. 5, smart people DO change their minds, even on important projects. Only insecure idiots stick with an idea even when new information or simply continued reflection would counsel otherwise. Glad I don't work for you, Ms. Dalton.

Posted by: lydgate | October 16, 2009 7:01 PM

You forgot the:

BE SURE TO ACKNOLEDGE VALUABLRE NEW EMPLOYEES - Assign 25 year veterans in the profession that you are lucky to have the photocopying and hole punching.

This actually happened to me today along with a number of the ones on your list.

Posted by: jdp123 | October 16, 2009 6:55 PM

This would be funny if at least half of it weren't actually happening at my company right now.

Posted by: downfast | October 16, 2009 6:43 PM

It doesn't get much lamer than this.

Posted by: DaveMiner | October 16, 2009 6:10 PM

Oh boy, that's hilarious... if it came out about 5 years ago. We have "The Office" TV Show now. I'll get my management humor from Michael Scott/Steve Carel, not Francie Dalton/The Post.

Big whiff guys.

Posted by: jwm1974 | October 16, 2009 4:14 PM

That wasn't funny at all.

Posted by: jwm1974 | October 16, 2009 4:11 PM

As a fellow management consultant, I feel the author has missed an important opportunity to use the industy standard terms that go with these tips.

I have helpfully added the terms below:

DELEGATE -Whenever an idea comes to mind, assign it to someone else immediately. Don't be concerned about whether it should be done. You can always abandon it later.

BE NIMBLE -Never put things in writing. Someone else can keep track of important things for you.

MULTI-TASK -Always assign the same task to multiple people. This will help you leverage the risk of missed deadlines.

KEEP YOUR SCHEDULE OPEN -Don't inform staff of your calendar. Your staff will come to love that sense of the unexpected and will be happy to see you when you do drop by.

BE FLEXIBLE -Change your mind often. Particularly on major projects. This demonstrates flexibility.

TRUST YOUR PEOPLE -Don't hesitate to switch up people's responsibilities - and don't worry about remembering to let appropriate staff know about such decisions. Remember: They're smart and will figure it out.

PROMOTE CREATIVITY -Don't have agendas for meetings. After all, staff should just enjoy being together, and an agenda would probably constrain innovative thinking.

STAY CONNECTED -Whenever staff are handling a particularly difficult situation, call them every five minutes or so to offer assistance and to provide feedback on the actions they're taking. They'll be grateful for your input.

USE OUTSOURCING -As you meet competent people during networking events, instantly retain them as subcontractors for...something. Your direct reports are sure to appreciate the extra help.

I hope this primer of terms helps those working with managment professionals like myself :)

Posted by: JVA01 | October 16, 2009 3:49 PM

You forgot these:

1) For exceptionally complicated or confidential projects, raise your voice, as if you were an American in a non-English speaking nation. Remember the louder you speak the easier it is for the other person to understand, even if they don't speak your language.

2) Sprinkle profanity in your directives; this assists in keeping subordinates focused on what you are saying.

3) Frequently revise deadlines; this is an excellent way to gauge who is able to work in an irrational, non-predictable environment.

Posted by: tmit | October 16, 2009 2:57 PM

I have to admit that I've encountered enough crappy "leadership" from superiors while working in a public service position that I read this and immediately thought--AHAAA--I've been given some insight into a managerial playbook.
There is very little leadership out there today. Mostly, you encounter managers looking for the next big thing they can hitch themselves to in order to move to a bigger and better payday somewhere else.
With the economy being what it is, there isn't even anywhere to unload these desperate climbers.
Businesses across the spectrum end up with employees with no clue and no real loyalty led by managers who espouse and have bred the same.
Can you tell I'm cynical on a Friday?

Posted by: chucktownCAPSfan | October 16, 2009 2:42 PM

Yikes! Boss at last job followed almost ALL of these great "tips." Praise Hashem, I am now free of the insanity, at new job, working for a good boss. Let's hear it for all the GOOD bosses today.

Posted by: SFMichele | October 16, 2009 2:29 PM

In case I wasnt clear, somewhere out there is an idiot reading this, taking it seriously, and is hard at work writing policies for his office based on this sarcastic list.

Posted by: tunatofu | October 16, 2009 1:56 PM

For many years Dilbert was considered hilarious because the characters were such extreme examples of people we really knew. Over time though it became funny because the everyday people we knew were so much like the characters in Dilbert. Sadly, over the years so many bosses have read Dilbert's tongue in cheek management "advice" and not had the sense to know that he was kidding. So, no, some people CANT TAKE A JOKE...or recognize sarcasm when they see it in print.

Posted by: tunatofu | October 16, 2009 1:53 PM

I'm amazed that there are people that cannot figure out this is a joke. Fortunately, there are still people that can discern humor without a laugh-track.

Posted by: moradus | October 16, 2009 1:42 PM

Wow. I'm impressed by how many actual bosses who read this feature (based on the number of posters who didn't get the joke).

Posted by: TheProFromDover | October 16, 2009 1:31 PM

Judging by the number of people who thought this was serious, I can see why some bosses might need to use some of these techniques.

Posted by: orie | October 16, 2009 1:14 PM

lol nice, these are all the things i love about my boss!

Posted by: squier13 | October 16, 2009 1:04 PM

I'm starting to think my bosses are a joke. They do several of the items mentioned in the article, which is sad. They also threaten to close my lab (which is a service lab for researchers) and want FT effort while not making the position FT. In addition, they keep adding more responsibilites and complaining about things not getting done, well you name it.....

Happy Friday!

Posted by: patpxs | October 16, 2009 1:04 PM

thanks for the comments -- i've updated the headline on the homepage to make the "category" a little more clear. happy boss's day!

Posted by: Andrea Useem | October 16, 2009 12:58 PM

Ha ha, of course it's a joke, duh.

Posted by: alarico | October 16, 2009 12:29 PM

I'm also hoping it's a joke. Stuff like this makes me rethink the value of the WashingtonPost. I'm supposed to read you journalists are supposed to provide serious articles. These articles playing me for a 'sucka' are annoying.

Posted by: randers001104 | October 16, 2009 12:08 PM

This is archived under the Humor section, although that's not clear from the link on the homepage.

Posted by: neversaylie | October 16, 2009 12:07 PM

Yes, this is a joke. Would have been nice to see a simple list of what bosses CAN do to make life better.

Posted by: dogsrule1 | October 16, 2009 12:06 PM

I could argue against almost every one of these points. I'm hoping it's a joke...

Posted by: P4CK4TT4CK | October 16, 2009 12:01 PM

The comments to this entry are closed.

 
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