The League

Michael Kun
Author

Michael Kun

Co-author of The Football Uncyclopedia. He is also the author of six other books and is a practicing attorney.

A waste of time

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Let me preface my thoughts about watching the scouting combine with a few comments.

First, we here at the League are not here to promote the NFL or the NFL Network. We are here to talk about the NFL and, where appropriate, offer critical observations.

Second, our local cable provider doesn't offer the NFL Network, so I couldn't watch the scouting combine even if I wanted to.

Third, I don't want to.

Don't get me wrong. I'll watch the NFL draft well past the point where I recognize the names of the players being selected. But the combine? Sorry, no interest.

I certainly understand why the scouting combine is a valuable tool for NFL talent evaluators, who want to see potential draftees in person. I also understand why the scouting combine is an imperfect tool, as we are all too familiar with teams that have fallen in love with workout warriors, only to learn that those talents did not transfer as well as hoped to the football field. (Anyone have a photo of Mike Mamula handy?) And I also understand the curiosity factor of NFL fans, who are being given a bit of a backstage glimpse into the workings of the NFL. But, ultimately, letting us in to see how the combine works is about as entertaining as letting us into the watch factory to see how they make watches. Or, more accurately, letting us see how the watch factory purchases the little hour and minute hands for their watches.

Unless you are affiliated with an NFL team, or unless you are bedridden and your TV is stuck on the NFL Network, I cannot imagine how anyone could watch more than 15 or 20 minutes of the scouting combine. I'm sorry, but I can't. If you believe I'm missing something, I would welcome an explanation of what I'm missing in the comments section below. (An explanation, please. No need for insults.)

That said, if you are going to watch more than 15 or 20 minutes of the scouting combine, I suggest you do the following in order to make the experience more enjoyable:
1) Have a good book handy, or the most recent issue of your favorite magazine.
2) Bring all of your paperwork with you so you can work on your taxes at the same time.
3) Married? Have a girlfriend? Ask her to sit on your lap while you're watching the combine.
4) Not married? Don't have a girlfriend? Perhaps this is a good time to contemplate why. And it just might have something to do with you spending hours watching the scouting combine and other non-sporting events in your free time.
5) Have a drink.
6) Order a pizza.
7) Have another drink.
8) Any chips in the house?
9) Have you clipped your nails lately? No? This might be a good time to do so.
10) Call your parents and apologize for all the crappy things you did as a child.
11) Call your grandparents. They love to hear from you, you know. Although even they might hang up if you start telling them about the 40 time of some running back from East Kentucky State.

By Michael Kun  |  February 25, 2010; 12:00 AM ET  | Category:  Draft , NFL , Scouting Combine Save & Share:  Send E-mail   Facebook   Twitter   Digg   Yahoo Buzz   Del.icio.us   StumbleUpon   Technorati  
Previous: Tomlinson the Eagle? | Next: Is the combine worth watching?

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